“Jurassic Park” Doc To Hatch T-Rex From Chickens; McNugget Fans Wait In Anticipation

Legendary fossil-hunter and autodidact Dinosaur expert Jack Horner - who served as the inspiration for Dr. Alan Grant, the lead character in “Jurassic Park” - has cooked up a finger-lickin’-good idea for bringing back the late, great Tyrannosaurus Rex.
In an interview he’s given with the chaps over at Wired Magazine, Horner suggests the seemingly-inconceivable can be accomplished by “flipping the right genetic switches in a chicken embryo...”
In Horner‘s just published provocative new book entitled: “How To Build A Dinosaur - Extinction Doesn’t Have To Be Forever,” the good-honorary doctor details his what-came-first-the-chicken-or-the-T-Rex theory; apparently - as he sees it - since birds are the descendants of dinosaurs, if one can tap into the developing embryos at the just right time, and tweak just the right genes, the result would be a sort of “dinochicken”.
His quotes, not ours.
Interestingly enough, when pressed by Wired as to whether or not there could be any sort of don’t-try-this-at-home caveats to this scheme, Horner optimistically wagered against the chances of our civilization being overrun by the aforementioned dreaded dinochickens.
On the contrary, in citing some of the benefits that might arise from his genetic tinkering, the ever-positive paleontologist posited that at the least, we were almost guaranteed “plumper chickens” - not to split hairs, but that scientific milestone has already been conquered by the late Frank Perdue.
Sidebar: not only was Perdue world-renowned for his advances in chicken eugenics, it was rumored that he himself may have been some sort of bizarre half-man, half-chicken hybrid.
Far-fetched, you say?
No lesser authority than the New York Times itself once suggested that the self-styled Picasso of Poultry did in deed, look uncannily like the very fowl he benefitted so financially, from.
In any event, Horner - always the maverick - comes across as quite undeterred by any criticism that his plans might be a bit half-shake-and-baked, arguing that “Scientists who play by someone else’s rules don’t stand much chance of making discoveries...”
Well put, old friend, well put.
After all, it was just that sort of iconoclastic thinking that allowed McDonald’s to perfect the then unimaginable McDLT-technology*; the unprecedented breakthrough in polystyrene-engineering that allowed the fast-food innovator to “keep the hot-side hot, and the cool-side, cool...” an achievement that, up until that point in time, was considered a theoretical impossibility on the scale of perpetual motion and absolute zero.
Who says there are no heroes left?
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*Yes... as a matter of fact, that IS Jason Alexander; apparently fulfilling his end of the Faustian-bargain which will later land him his role on Seinfeld.

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